Project dedication

ClearanceClarence
ClearanceClarence
In loving memory of Jen
1993 - 2018
“Come to me, Dibella, for without you, my words must lie dull and leaden without the gilding of grace and sagacity to enchant the reader’s ear and eye.”

As most of you know, our dear Rebelzize lost the love of his life on March 8, 2018. Therefore we decided that we dedicate this project to the memory of Jen.

Please wish Rebel the best with the future and the coming months. We are a community and we take care of each other. Not much more to say except to support him in his time of sadness

Also be sure to take a look at the video rebel made where he talks about her on youtube. It’s a sad video but it’s beautiful, ​definitely made my eyes tear up

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  • benoit says:

    rip

  • thomas says:

    sarry be lots of fun

  • Ben says:

    I know this isn’t a new post but I just want to say how truly saddened I am after watching this video and I hope you and all of Jen’s friends and family are doing okay. Depression causes such despair, regret, pain and darkness in the life of those affected by it and of those around the person affected by it, especially when it leads to this. I know what depression feels like and to feel like the only way out is to take your own life and when I hear this story, the story of someone who just couldn’t manage to pull themselves out of its horrible tainted grip, I am truly heartbroken and to say “I am sorry for your loss” does not even begin to cover what I feel for those affected.

  • Emmy says:

    I am so sorry for your loss! I hope things do get better soon. and I cannot wait to play Skyblivion!

  • Chris says:

    Thank you for making this

  • Elliot says:

    Lovely Video. Thanks for making it. It sounds like your have a very grounded solid approach to difficult things. 🙂

  • Thiago says:

    I’m so sorry bro…
    She will be remembered by all of us. I know you will do your best to honor her. Greetings from a TES fan from Brazil.

  • Paul says:

    Like many, I came to see how the project was getting on and stumbled on this. So sorry for your loss, but it’s great that her memory will live on through the dedication of this project.

  • Jeffrey Schneidermann says:

    Came to check out the oblivion mod! Found the feels! I am so sorry for your loss.

  • Sandun says:

    I watch the video till the end. I am so sorry about your lost man. I know how you feel, man. I went through a smilier situation my self. I lost the love of my life in the same way and I didn’t have anyone to talk to about my pain. I know it hurts a lot. She passed away 2017 March 13 also my birthday was that day. IDK why she took that decision tho But she left me. I still love her till this day. I hope you are doing well now. Keep up the good work. I really sorry about your lost.

  • Sandun says:

    I recently if out about this project and this is amazing. Sorry about your lost man.

  • Jeremy says:

    Just watched this today and it really got to me, more than I would have thought. I have a family member who deals with depression from time to time (more situational though, not chronic). A good lesson for everyone out there, know the warning signs and try all the options. There are a lot of therapies, drugs, surgeries that can help. The only thing worse than a person taking their own life is the loved ones having to live with the loss afterwards. I feel such a strong desire to offer you comfort but there is nothing I can really say. You seem like a great guy (and good looking – don’t believe anyone who tells you otherwise) While I do believe we are destined to meet the people we meet I don’t think there is only the “one” and that’s it. I hope you do meet someone again eventually if you haven’t already. Not to replace Jen but to add to her (if that makes sense). I truly hope you’re doing better and have found ways to move on and keep being the man she helped you to become.

  • Derin says:

    This project will make her memory live on in another place than the hearts of those beloved to her. I haven’t ever had an experience that jarring, and I might not understand you the way the people that have lived through what you did, but I offer my condolences to you. I have come to greatly appreciate and respect certain Skyrim modders, and you are one of them.

  • Dan says:

    Man, I don’t know you, or who your girlfriend was, but thank you for sharing yourself and your girlfriend’s life with us. Even though we may be strangers, all of us who watched this video now carry a small torch of her light. Her memory won’t die, ever.

  • Benjamin says:

    What video….
    Such a woman.
    I am by u. such a woman…
    many can not understand such a loss. glad u lost not the will to live on.

  • how says:

    How did she die?

  • Marc Higgs says:

    im so sry to hear this depression is shit people just dont understand what it does to your head . Dont blame yourself mate just remember the good times and hold on to them xx

  • DOOMguy says:

    I am really sorry mate

  • Tyv says:

    I’m very late here and I’m not very good at wording these kinds of things but I just wanted to say I’m sorry for your loss and I wish you the best, I sat through the entire vid at once and I have to say it was extremely moving and I wanted to give you a hug the entire time.

    My condolences. <3

  • Chester says:

    I’ll confess I’m not a regular here on the Skyblivion project, but I can’t help but feel moved. I may not know Rebel or the team here, but I hardly think that matters when it comes to condolences. When we lose someone special, it is jarring and scary and painful and confusing. No amount of time is going to heal that wound, I’m sad to say. A wound like this, a wound in your soul, cannot be healed. Whenever you think back to this time in your life, it will still hurt. Even a decade from now, the loss will always be there.

    But while souls don’t heal, they DO grow. Rebel, again I must confess I don’t know you, but you’re young and you seem to be among friends here. Time, no matter how painfully slow it seems to pass at the moment, will continue on. And while your reverence for Jen will never die out or fade, the only remedy for love lost is to love more. Each day is a triumph when it comes to surviving such an awful tragedy, and I sincerely hope that you see countless triumphs to come. It is important to not feel guilt or shame about either your attachment to this special individual or about moving on; that is the burden of the living, and it is one we all must bear. Yet with all burdens, there is no shame in seeking a companion to help you carry the weight.

    One day, you may lose again. It’s a sad, painful fact of life. But each loss is but a finite wound upon an infinite soul, and pain can only be overcome by perseverance. So say strong, Rebel. Allowing yourself to grieve is not weakness, it is strength unimaginable to many of us. Your pain is not a sign of weakness but a testament to the true depths of your humanity.

    So grieve, remember, and celebrate Jen for who she was. And the best homage you, or anyone else can ever pay to the dead is to keep on living with them in our hearts and minds. Live for those who do not anymore, for in doing so, you keep them very much alive.

  • Oka says:

    We’re truly sorry for your loss.. Just know that the information about Jen that you’ve provided to us all was absolutely beautiful. It sounds like Jen was an amazing person. Experiencing the loss of someone you love can be one of the most difficult and painful tragedies you’ll ever have to endure. Please, just remember you’re not alone in this experience. Even if none of us ever really know you on a personal basis, by hearing your story, I hope you can find some comfort in knowing this community is sharing your loss. We wish you the best. Please, take care of yourself.

  • Vikey says:

    Never had an experience like this. but keep do what you do, do what you love and passionate at. I hope you’re doing well

  • I’m sorry for your loss. How’d see die?

  • Legault says:

    Kubler Ross Model of Grief. Don’t worry man, you’ll get over it eventually because it does end with acceptance. I’m extremely sorry for your loss. We are here for you if you need any support ever.

  • Joe Dolahenty says:

    Sorry for your loss.

  • Wolf says:

    That’s rough brother. I know the feeling of lossing a loved one to depression. My heart goes out to you and the family, the world is a little less meaningful without people like her in it. . May the 9 divines forever watch over her as she is welcomed into the halls of sovngarde.

  • Felix says:

    You seem like an amazing human being, as you rose from the demons of your own past. Depression unfortunately is a serious desease that sometimes ends up fatal without any chance to avoid the worst. The way you’ve described how you guys handled each others situation and the continous support you gave to each other is amazing. Not many people can handle a depressed person the way you did. You may have saved her more life time and happieness than you might even be aware off.

    I wish you all the best and as already stated by other commentors: please be brave enough to look for professional help if you start feeling overwhelmed by your situation.

  • RIP says:

    ps

    It doesn’t matter if nobody cares, as long as you care about it.

    Be strong, for her and for yourself.

  • Bhushan says:

    Sorry for your loss. Wish you all the best for your future…

  • Haqualisto says:

    Life sucks! Cannot understand why it happens to good peoples. And bad peoples are rewarded…

  • Ian Brown says:

    I know what it’s like to lose someone close to you. I lost my dad when I was 5, stay strong.

  • Victor says:

    It’s sad to lose someone you love, do not hesitate to talk to your family or a psychologist, it can relieve us of all this suffering. Good luck.
    Sorry for my bad English.

  • Daniel says:

    Be strong.Life is unfair.Lost my love too..sometimes..my eyes meets sky..and i talk to her..and she is smiling at me from above..i know it.and Your love is smiling on You too.Be strong..but it is so..so hard.

  • Etha says:

    I speak very bad English so I did not understand the entirety of the video, but I was touched by what happens to you and I wanted to write you this comment to make you by a suggestion : I’ve been interested for a long time in Skyblivion and Skywind, and if I had the chance, I’ll make the love of your life immortal by representing it on your mod and as a result of it a memory towards infinity and ‘beyond 🙂

  • Jordan P says:

    I’m so sorry to hear this happen, I wish you and your family the best wishes.

    Stay strong.

  • generalrose says:

    I haven’t watched your videos before, but I stayed through the end for this one. Jen, your Yen, will be remembered. She sounds like she was an incredible person and I hope that making this video helped you begin the process of going to a new normal. Your story, her story, it’s going to stick with me.

  • Alekurt says:

    I just visited the website like do every month to check some updates about the project and i heard these terrible news.
    I feel really sorry for this and i want to wish you all the best for your future.
    Don’t give up, stay strong and life will give you some energy back.

  • Steven says:

    I don’t even know how to write out this comment. Your video has really touched me and made me feel someway I cannot describe. I cant even begin to understand how bad this hurts right now, it has to be something awful. I suffer from depression myself and often have fits just like you described fear and stressed related. My outlet is often through the Elder Scrolls titles, they can usually make me feel better. I think its absolutely wonderful you are dedicating this project in her memory. I’m so sorry for your loss and I know how terrible depression is first hand. I wish you all the best mate, I hope you can move through the pain.

  • TA says:

    Sorry for your loss! It’s not fair, at all. Wish you all the strength

  • The Wonderer says:

    how did she die?? I’m going to have to do a reverse image search aren’t I….

  • Butte says:

    Hey man, I’m sorry this happened. I hope you’re doing okay, and I hope you can move through the pain bit by bit. Seems like Jen was a beautiful & loving girl and I’m sad that this happened to you both. All the best, man, really.

  • Valtoc says:

    I am so sorry… I cannot express properly how sorry I am. Nobody deserve that. I am truly and deeply sorry for you. I wish you all the strength and courage in the world.

    I am glad the project is now dedicated to her.

  • Fabi says:

    I’m so sorry for your lost…
    I also wish you all the best.

  • Ben says:

    I can not express how sorry I feel for you.
    I wish you all the power you need, although I can imagine that in this situation nothing seems to be able to numb the pain.
    What a beautiful idea to dedicate this project to her…
    Wish you all the best!

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