Project dedication

As most of you know, our dear Rebelzize lost the love of his life on March 8, 2018. Therefore we decided that we dedicate this project to the memory of Jen.

Please wish Rebel the best with the future and the coming months. We are a community and we take care of each other. Not much more to say except to support him in his time of sadness.

Also be sure to take a look at the video rebel made where he talks about her on youtube. It’s a sad video but it’s beautiful, ​definitely made my eyes tear up.

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Sad. I feel for you. I have lost a sister, a nephew and an uncle to suicide. My Nephew on 03/09/2020. He drowned himself in our local river. Unfortunately, it took a week to recover his body, which is faster than it has taken for some other poor families. I myself fight with demons every day and fear one day I too will succumb to such an end. Good luck m8.


Edit. Nephew died 03/09/18


I don’t know if you will ever read this, but if you do I beg of you to fight those demons. If you ever get to the point where you believe that you have lost don’t think of yourself and your successes/failures, instead think of the impact that you have had and can still have on others around you both positive and negative. Fighting for yourself may seem pointless, but fighting for others will keep you fighting.


As March 8 rolls around again, know that people are still rooting for you.




sarry be lots of fun


I know this isn’t a new post but I just want to say how truly saddened I am after watching this video and I hope you and all of Jen’s friends and family are doing okay. Depression causes such despair, regret, pain and darkness in the life of those affected by it and of those around the person affected by it, especially when it leads to this. I know what depression feels like and to feel like the only way out is to take your own life and when I hear this story, the story of someone who just couldn’t manage to pull themselves out of its horrible tainted grip, I am truly heartbroken and to say “I am sorry for your loss” does not even begin to cover what I feel for those affected.


I am so sorry for your loss! I hope things do get better soon. and I cannot wait to play Skyblivion!


Thank you for making this


Lovely Video. Thanks for making it. It sounds like your have a very grounded solid approach to difficult things. 🙂


I’m so sorry bro…
She will be remembered by all of us. I know you will do your best to honor her. Greetings from a TES fan from Brazil.


Like many, I came to see how the project was getting on and stumbled on this. So sorry for your loss, but it’s great that her memory will live on through the dedication of this project.

Jeffrey Schneidermann

Came to check out the oblivion mod! Found the feels! I am so sorry for your loss.


I watch the video till the end. I am so sorry about your lost man. I know how you feel, man. I went through a smilier situation my self. I lost the love of my life in the same way and I didn’t have anyone to talk to about my pain. I know it hurts a lot. She passed away 2017 March 13 also my birthday was that day. IDK why she took that decision tho But she left me. I still love her till this day. I hope you are doing well now. Keep up the good work. I really sorry about your lost.


I recently if out about this project and this is amazing. Sorry about your lost man.




Just watched this today and it really got to me, more than I would have thought. I have a family member who deals with depression from time to time (more situational though, not chronic). A good lesson for everyone out there, know the warning signs and try all the options. There are a lot of therapies, drugs, surgeries that can help. The only thing worse than a person taking their own life is the loved ones having to live with the loss afterwards. I feel such a strong desire to offer you comfort but there is nothing I can really say. You seem like a great guy (and good looking – don’t believe anyone who tells you otherwise) While I do believe we are destined to meet the people we meet I don’t think there is only the “one” and that’s it. I hope you do meet someone again eventually if you haven’t already. Not to replace Jen but to add to her (if that makes sense). I truly hope you’re doing better and have found ways to move on and keep being the man she helped you to become.


This project will make her memory live on in another place than the hearts of those beloved to her. I haven’t ever had an experience that jarring, and I might not understand you the way the people that have lived through what you did, but I offer my condolences to you. I have come to greatly appreciate and respect certain Skyrim modders, and you are one of them.


Man, I don’t know you, or who your girlfriend was, but thank you for sharing yourself and your girlfriend’s life with us. Even though we may be strangers, all of us who watched this video now carry a small torch of her light. Her memory won’t die, ever.


What video….
Such a woman.
I am by u. such a woman…
many can not understand such a loss. glad u lost not the will to live on.


How did she die?

Marc Higgs

im so sry to hear this depression is shit people just dont understand what it does to your head . Dont blame yourself mate just remember the good times and hold on to them xx


I am really sorry mate


I’m very late here and I’m not very good at wording these kinds of things but I just wanted to say I’m sorry for your loss and I wish you the best, I sat through the entire vid at once and I have to say it was extremely moving and I wanted to give you a hug the entire time.

My condolences. <3


I’ll confess I’m not a regular here on the Skyblivion project, but I can’t help but feel moved. I may not know Rebel or the team here, but I hardly think that matters when it comes to condolences. When we lose someone special, it is jarring and scary and painful and confusing. No amount of time is going to heal that wound, I’m sad to say. A wound like this, a wound in your soul, cannot be healed. Whenever you think back to this time in your life, it will still hurt. Even a decade from now, the loss will always be there.

But while souls don’t heal, they DO grow. Rebel, again I must confess I don’t know you, but you’re young and you seem to be among friends here. Time, no matter how painfully slow it seems to pass at the moment, will continue on. And while your reverence for Jen will never die out or fade, the only remedy for love lost is to love more. Each day is a triumph when it comes to surviving such an awful tragedy, and I sincerely hope that you see countless triumphs to come. It is important to not feel guilt or shame about either your attachment to this special individual or about moving on; that is the burden of the living, and it is one we all must bear. Yet with all burdens, there is no shame in seeking a companion to help you carry the weight.

One day, you may lose again. It’s a sad, painful fact of life. But each loss is but a finite wound upon an infinite soul, and pain can only be overcome by perseverance. So say strong, Rebel. Allowing yourself to grieve is not weakness, it is strength unimaginable to many of us. Your pain is not a sign of weakness but a testament to the true depths of your humanity.

So grieve, remember, and celebrate Jen for who she was. And the best homage you, or anyone else can ever pay to the dead is to keep on living with them in our hearts and minds. Live for those who do not anymore, for in doing so, you keep them very much alive.


” The Blacklist ” Cape May
Very sobering.


We’re truly sorry for your loss.. Just know that the information about Jen that you’ve provided to us all was absolutely beautiful. It sounds like Jen was an amazing person. Experiencing the loss of someone you love can be one of the most difficult and painful tragedies you’ll ever have to endure. Please, just remember you’re not alone in this experience. Even if none of us ever really know you on a personal basis, by hearing your story, I hope you can find some comfort in knowing this community is sharing your loss. We wish you the best. Please, take care of yourself.


Never had an experience like this. but keep do what you do, do what you love and passionate at. I hope you’re doing well